A contest was held for people to submit their theories on ANY subject.
See our page Thinking: Theories, Logic, Humor for the winning ideas.
Teaching Math in 1950:
A logger sells a truckload of lumber for $100. His cost of production is 4/5 of the price. What is his profit?Teaching Math in 1960:
A logger sells a truckload of lumber for $100. His cost of production is 4/5 of the price, or $80. What is his profit?Teaching Math in 1970 (a.k.a. "new math"):
A logger exchanges a set "L" of lumber for a set "M" of money. The cardinality of set "M" is 100. Each element is worth one dollar. Make 100 dots representing the elements of the set "M". The set "C", the cost of production contains 20 fewer points than set "M". Represent the set "C" as a subset of set "M" and answer the following question: What is the cardinality of the set "P" for profits?Teaching Math in 1980:
A logger sells a truckload of lumber for $100. Her cost of production is $80 and her profit is $20. Your assignment: Underline the number 20.Teaching Math in 1990:
By cutting down beautiful forest trees, the logger makes $20. What do you think of this way of making a living? Topic for class participation after answering the question: How did the forest birds and squirrels feel as the logger cut down the trees? There are no wrong answers.Teaching Math in 2000 :
Questions from homeschooling mom
For her 4 year old - Count the trees in the back yard, honey - and then we'll look them up and see what kinds they are.For her 6 year old - How old was the tree that used to be here (count the rings in the stump)?
For her 12 and 13 year olds - Work together to figure out how much space our trees take up in the back yard, and where we should put a garden and how big it could be. How tall is each tree (Estimate to the nearest half foot using proportions and the length of the shadow)? Where would their roots spread out in our yard? Where would be a good place to plant a garden and how big in square feet could it be?
For her 16 year old - How much would it cost to take a trip to Yellowstone national park for two weeks? Lay out two possible scenic routes with 4 side trips to see historical sites. Give figures for gas for our van and overnight accomodations and site fees for two possibilities: staying in motels or staying in campgrounds along the way; food costs for the trip; cost of buying or repairing any equipment we'd need to take (including getting the car repaired). Also, what changes do we need to make in our budget to be able to afford to do this in the spring?
Q: How does a home schooler change a lightbulb?
A: First, mom checks three books on electricity out of the library. then the kids make models of light bulbs, read a biography of Thomas Edison and do a skit based on his life. Next, everyone studies the history of lighting methods, wrapping up with dipping their own candles. Next everyone takes a trip to the store where they compare types of light bulbs as well as prices and figure out how much change they'll get if they buy two bulbs for $1.99 and pay with a five dollar bill. On the way home, a discussion develops over the history of money and also Abraham Lincoln, as his picture is on the five dollar bill. Finally, after building a homemade ladder out of branches dragged from the woods, the light bulb is installed. And there is light.
A first grade teacher collected well-known proverbs. She
gave each child in her class the first half of a proverb, and had
them come up with the rest. Their insight may surprise you...
Better to be safe than.....punch a 5th grader.Strike while the.....bug is close.
It's always darkest before.....Daylight Savings time.
Never underestimate the power of.....termites.
You can lead a horse to water but.....how?
Don't bite the hand that.....looks dirty.
No news is.....impossible.
You can't teach an old dog new.....math.
If you lie down with dogs, you'll.....stink in the morning.
The pen is mightier than the .....pigs.
An idle mind is.....the best way to relax.
Where there's smoke there's.....Pollution.
Happy the bride who.....gets all the presents.
A penny saved is.....not much.
Two's company, three's.....the Musketeers.
Don't put off till tomorrow what.....you put on to go to bed.
Laugh and the whole world laughs with you, cry and... you have to blow your nose.
Children should be seen and not.....spanked or grounded.
If at first you don't succeed.....get new batteries.
You get out of something what you.....see pictured on the box.
When the blind leadeth the blind.....get out of the way.
Words of Wisdom
Pythagorean theorem: 24 words.
Archimedes' Principle: 67 words.
The 10 Commandments: 179 words.
The Gettysburg address: 286 words.
The Declaration of Independence: 1,300 words.
The US Government regulations on the sale of cabbage: 26,911 words.
SignsOn a Plumber's truck: "We repair what your husband fixed."
Pizza shop slogan: "Buy our pizza. We knead the dough."
Door of a plastic surgeon's office: "Hello. We can help you pick your nose."
At a towing company: "We don't charge an arm and a leg. We want tows."
In a non-smoking area: "If we see smoke, we will assume you are on fire and take appropriate action."
On a maternity room door: "Push. Push. Push."
At an optometrist's office: "If you don't see what you're looking for, you've come to the right place."
On a fence: "Salesmen welcome! Dog food is expensive."
At a car dealership: "The best way to get back on your feet - miss a car payment."
In a veterinarian's waiting room: "Be back in 5 minutes. Sit! Stay!"
In the front yard of a funeral home: "Drive slow. We'll wait."
Parenting Whenever your kids are out of control, you can take comfort from the thought that even God's omnipotence did not extend to his kids. After creating heaven and earth, God created Adam and Eve.
And the first thing He said to them was: "Don't."
"Don't what?" Adam replied.
"Don't eat the forbidden fruit." God said.
"Forbidden fruit? We got forbidden fruit? Hey, Eve...we got Forbidden Fruit!"
"No way!"
"Yes WAY!"
"Don't eat that fruit!" said God.
"Why?"
"Because I'm your Creator and I said so!" said God, wondering why he hadn't stopped after making the elephants. A few minutes later God saw the kids having an apple break and He was angry.
"Didn't I tell you not to eat that fruit?" the First Parent asked.
"Uh huh," Adam replied.
"Then why did you?"
"I dunno," Adam answered. "She started it!"
"Did not! The snake told me to - it's his fault. "
Having had it with the two of them, God's punishment was that Adam and Eve should have children of their own. Thus the pattern was set and it has never changed. But there is a reassurance in this story. If God had trouble handling his children, what makes you think it will be a piece of cake for you?